Ode to Love

I finish listening to the song at my place, "Trees" still on my mind. My thoughts go freeform, flowing without resistance, back to my school days when this world's potential felt so much more tangible and unknown all at once. I hear her ask "what did you think of the song?" and my mind sparks to reconcile these differences I am suddenly aware of. I am no longer strictly at my place, but I am at my place and the room from my dream, and The Phoenix's room all at once. Where my mom once sat The Phoenix sits instead, and instead of making a positive remark on another woman's song, the woman sitting here now asks what I thought of her own. "I really enjoyed it, somehow so familiar, although I cannot recall where precisely I had heard it from before. To be honest, from my perspective, it may have been one of those memories which was made now, but embedded itself into my past; still, I would not mind if that is what it had done." She gives me a famili...

Did I fall asleep Perhaps in part now dreaming? Things feel... intertwined Like thoughts I feel here Are from a conversation We're having elsewhere Like my actions here Have their crafted mirror there I can see in part A strange sensation Standing on both land and sea The threshold of dreams It makes me wonder, If we are talking there now, How might we agree? Does an agreement, An open ocean parley, Count here if I'm here? Fingers along thread...  "'If Jesus accompanied Then it could be so'" So what shall we do? Write a book with no ending? Dream dreams into life?

So, someone else's presence, from one's own perspective, is a combination of signals in the brain. The sight of them, the sound, the feel, everything, from one's own perspective regarding the other that they perceive, is ultimately these brainwaves, in a familiar pattern. This intertwines with the the idea that consciousness is these brainwaves, our bodies carefully constructed compilations of sensors and machines designed to generate these waves and in turn be driven by them. I can imagine, and even have seen firsthand one night, hallucinations so vivid that they are indistinguishable from real people. Granted, personally I did not touch these others, but they were visible and plain as day. They acted as if they were real, and spoke audibly; I had no basis to say that they were not real except in retrospect, in the context being broken. So, looking at this from the perspective of strictly consciousness, given the right combination of factors and stimuli, my brain saw and h...

I find myself in a crowd, a head taller than most, but this is nothing new. I chat with my friends and those I recognize as many others mill about, but nothing really feels real, nothing seems tangible enough to draw my attention. Then I see you. You are as obscured as you can be this night, well before I knew you and seemingly even before you've bloomed. You are small and sepia, attempting to blend in amongst dull colors, but even still I spot you at the farthest distance, first sight, and stop and stare. I recognize you straight away, despite what seems reasonable or possibly even appropriate for this scenario, and I catch your curious eyes fixed on only me from the crowd. In some senses I had seen you many times before, but in these dreams it is as if every time is the first for me, and I light up with joy invariably. For you it seems different though, and I realize this may very well be the first time you've seen me. You slip into the crowd once more, but it is clear you ar...

The date moves to the restaurant, and I am walking in just as before but this time I can already remember my soulmate, but I do not remember as I do in dreams, but as I still experience her while awake. I still consider writing in my blog and the absurdity of it all. How I would have to describe my date's laugh, but it would not be her laugh. How I would describe the intimacy of our conversation, but it would not be her words I was recalling on record. My mind drifted to the many beautiful women I had seen that day, but each smile or cute butt only served to remind me that it was her smile and cute butt I was missing so dearly. Before even writing a word I knew I could not continue the facade, but I still remembered needing to respect the land I found myself in, and not break script. Fortunately I had broken it just enough the first time to make this second trip easy. I find myself riding with my brother-in-law to my house so I that could change into wedding clothes. The computer i...