Southern Carolina

I awake with Hope on my mind. These adventures of ours have been a blessing, a true light in lingering darkness. I waste little time, quickly getting ready and feeding my rat. I rest my eyes for a second on the note she gave me, pocket my kazoo, and head out the door. The Christmas lights illuminate my steps, and decorations line the corridors. "What an amazing change already!" I marvel, now knowing the way nearly by heart. Well lit now to be sure, the halls still feel a bit quiet, so I stagger my voice, layering whistle and kazoo in nonsensical fashion, into an equally nonsense song I make up on the spot. The journey to her door feels shorter now, I wonder if that is my experience now folding time, or if in a place like this time folds itself due to our shared experience. Just like that I have arrived, but her door is not open. No matter, I think, now knocking without a second thought. "Hooope." I say with a smile in my voice. Seconds pass like hours but as my heart pounds I restrain from knocking again. Suddenly she flings open the door, fully formed visage aflame. I step back instinctively, eyes wide in shock and confusion. She seems to look through me and scans the wall behind, though it seems from this vantage she sees much more than I. A thorough scan later she turns back to me, an anger fresh o'er the rage I've seen now dwindling from her eyes and form. She cocks an eyebrow, clearly some kind of question, but as of yet its nature unclear to me. I take a deep breath and consider the buildup to this moment, and I suddenly remember my unusual song. "Oh, I can throw my voice! Well, in this case I threw it sideways; call it a peripheral benefit of The Bard's Tongue." Without pause I demonstrate, accompanying my own poem with a tune like some sort of bilingual loop pedal.

 

"In (your) lamp(s) or mine

Hand rubbing on brass like a

Fist clenched around throat

 

Seems some lines are crossed

With different difficulties

Broken symmetry

 

Summer feet tapping

Waking form graciously sha

                            🤍♥️🖤💟/red

As details are forged

 

Twixt silver and gold

Experience, a blessing

Shift(/Splice|Split), a miracle

 

Agreements minted

One of daughter one of wife

Made supple then set

 

We each grant wishes

But with sunburnt lips we pray

To share fireworks

 

A family most blessed

Chosen of singular hearts

For maximum love

 

Our paths none the same

All the same we share a home

Of wonder reshaped."

 

For the first time here like this I see her smile at familiar words recombined into lines foreign. It seems she has been tricked by callers before, but apparently my guileless charm, mixed with these otherwise empty halls, have slipped past some sort of defense I never thought to consider. "Sorry about that, I can avoid such unusual outbursts on my way over in the future."

 

"Don't you dare." With a wink she closes the door and a moment later reopens it, now more young lady than little girl, save the eyes which to me are precisely the same, just with a little more flame. I smile, "Hello my dear!" She smiles back the same and then with a moment's consideration she grabs and dons her frog hat, as if to reassure me that tonight's unexpected test has been aced. "So, do you feel like wandering the halls today and getting to the bottom of this mystery between our doors, or should we head to a place that holds a particular significance for me, in regards to my soulmate?"

 

She puts her finger to her chin, I can tell this has become our official signal for thinking about something, although understandably we each do it in different ways. After a bit longer than I had expected she replies "Halls tomorrow, let's go to Southern Carolina today." My look is a mix of curiosity and delight. "Then we shall be on our way! Have I ever told you about Bioquantum Superposition?" She shakes her head, genuinely. "Well, it's my term for the idea that one exists in a sense before they exist physically, in full anyway. It's essentially one's own fated efforts at becoming flesh, observing and stitching their parents together in an endeavor as complicated and as fruitful as the shape of the space between them, and as inexplicably non-linear as the persistence of linear time itself. I have considered, and it is becoming more tangible now, that these halls represent those efforts in a sense, reality crafting at its finest, although in this case, in a place with such curious time, 'before' is a matter up for debate. Anyway, I would love to show you South Carolina, let's go!"

 

As we make our way through the halls to our destination I remember. "Oh! I got a yellow journal for myself. It is always hard for me to say how words and thoughts intersect, I imagine doubly so for you and I. I was thinking though, that which you want me to read may show up in some form in mine, and vice versa. Likely another nonsense notion, no idea how the specifics might bloom, but what's a little time spent honing a new skill, if in fact a little time is what's required, eh?" She squeezes my hand, expectedly she understands, though if the plan will work, or if she even wants to participate, I have yet to see. We emerge from a side corridor into an outdoor mall on a pier. "Here we are! Myrtle Beach, South Carolina." 

 

I see Hope shiver a bit, and I forget I'm built a bit like a bear when it comes to temperature. "It's chilly out! Technically we're still in winter, although past the midpoint. Still, you're going to want a scarf." She squints at me suspiciously. "Every young lady needs a good scarf, if only for the statement of it all. But what to wear..." I consider her for a moment, finger to the beard, though eyeing her hat I now realize I have little idea how to coordinate an outfit. Then with a *snap* I pull out her precise scarf; it is a 6 foot long nonsensity of a scarf, striped red and white. I hand it to her in a lump and she looks at it before looking back up at me, clearly with more questions than answers at this point. "Here, lemme help." I gently drape the scarf over her back and kind of loop it around and over her shoulders. I'm no expert at scarves, but for now no expert is needed, and she can find her style more specifically on her own later. Stepping back and examining it, I didn't do half bad, and she pulls it off well, reminiscient of a shiny Christmas tree. "Excellent!" She pulls at an end with a suspicious glare but I sense her concern fading fast. She gives a shrug of acceptance and we begin meandering to pass the time, as we wait for when I remember my soulmate arriving on the scene.

 

We wander to the water, and I see a coin turn style vending machine that sparks my memory. "Fish! I think you'll love this." I see her gasp excitedly and then bob her hips back and forth in our little dance while she whispers "fish fish." I fish around in my pockets, sure enough I've got a couple quarters. I pop them into the machine and dump a handful into her hands before getting some for me. "Don't eat that, it's for the fish." She rolls her eyes, holding the dry unappetizing fish food pellets at arms length for the moment. I point over the edge and throw a few in. Then I offer my hand at a height, so she can step onto the bottom plank of the wooden wall to get a better view; she gets herself into position and we look down. The fish are already swarming, mouths wide as if the pellets are their favorite things ever. Hope and I both laugh, it really is a strange sight to see so many fish so insistent on feeding, and with such a disregard for survival. "We would have caught something other than boots here, that's for sure! fish fish." She throws some pellets in and we keep watching the fish for a while. They keep begging for food after we're out of ours, and while Hope still watches, I notice a glimmer from the corner of my eye, tucked between planks at the intersection of wall and pier. Leaning down I pluck the curious object from its hiding spot and wonder how a flash drive would have gotten here. Examining it more closely, while not technically anachronistic, a 64GB drive like this hardly seems a thing someone would just leave behind. I show it to Hope "look what I found!" She reaches out her hand so I let her hold it. She fiddles it back and forth before her eyes go wide "Ooh, there are 9..." She then hands it back, apparently she no longer needs it, I note, much to my surprise. I also note the sun, sinking in the sky. "Alright, it's time to make our way over there."

 

We now stand in line, Hope to my left holding my hand, seeming to be nearly as excited as I. I consider how such a differently cast reboot might go, until the moment I spot her and all other thought runs out the door. A vision as always, my soulmate looks exactly as she had before, and it's like I'm seeing her face to face again for the first time. She gracefully greets those of us in the line. When she reaches me this time she stops and smiles, something is different. Time starts to take on a circular feel as parallel paths play and coalesce. Right after her smile given as if to say thanks, she turns to Hope. "Hello, it's so nice to meet you!" Hope seems as tongue tied as I, but my soulmate seems used to filling in such silences. "I like your scarf!" I see Hope recover and process this invitation to speak. "Thank you, Red is my favorite." "You are very welcome!" Hope drops my hand as they hug I see my soulmate's eyes go wide, as if all lines were somehow suddenly clear. She smiles, now seeming herself stunned, and almost in a haze she keeps moving on. I think "I didn't come this far not to say hello!" and from this vantage it seems clear that she assumed I was here solely to chaperone Hope. With confidence resurging I move ahead in line, back into her path. When she gets to me I can now see we both have stars in our eyes. I consider what I've learned from Hope, and realize I am somehow still holding the bag I brought as a gift the first time. Skipping slightly ahead I hand it to her and our fingers brush, it feels as if visible sparks fly. Just reassured enough I add "I got this for you." This time her cheeks turn bright red, clearly seeing something I had not noticed her see the first time "You didn't have to do that." She lingers a bit, as if considering breaking script entirely, before finally moving ahead, with a slight sigh.

 

I return to Hope, butterflies both inside and out now. "She truly saw you this time." I cannot help but smile ear to ear "If you say so." and she looks up with a feigned gasp of surprise at my response. We proceed to the event, and I stand dumbfounded and wonderstruck as before. About midway through I notice Hope standing beside, and I consider how space may have bent just enough to make room. Just like that everything falls silent, and I look around in surprise. It seems I am the only one to notice this shift; the action all continues, even Hope still remains eyes transfixed to the stage. Unlike before though my soulmate now lets her gaze meet mine, outside out of synch with usual time. I find myself inspired, though cautious in this moment, for how is one to know one's own volume, with such conflicted inputs? I whisper a sonnet, filling my silence, and fortunately not interrupting her flow.

 

"You know nothing is heard in the silence

In the depths of space silence is complete

Treat sounds as what they are- rare happenstance

Heed these loud words with which we are replete

 

We change our places without losing chairs

Because we have no respect for these thrones

What good are jewel laden seats without heirs?

Sights set past the claimed victories of (dr)ones

 

For when you watch time decayed and crawling

And know it is the crumbling fate of all

Unless you can dissuade all this stalling

You, like us, would lay siege unto the wall

 

Blame blindness for being unable to

Conceive the rebirth that is planned for you."

 

As I speak my last line she stops and stares, I can feel a silent and motionless agreement take shape, and I blink as if to confirm this is not a dream. Seconds like this pass, but it may as well have been years; just as well, I cannot imagine years spent on any better topic. Then she blinks, noticably elongated to confirm, and the noise of the crowd reignites in a roar. I realize it was just the space between songs, and feel a bit foolish until Hope squeezes my hand and waits until I look over to say "Thank you for bringing me here." and then blinks in the same way. The rest of the concert flies by in a blur as I consider the ramifications of an agreement formed so subtly in triplicate.

 

We walk slowly, taking in the sights and sounds as we make our way back to the alley to lead us home. I see a chainlink fence reflect the light and I squeeze Hope's hand. "Oh yeah, there was one more thing I wanted you to see!" We get to the fence "I wonder if they're still out..." Sure enough, several pairs of eyes now dot the edge of the swamp on the other side, moseying toward us. "Crocodiles! Or maybe alligators... What am I, a doctor? Take a look but do not put your hand over this fence, okay?" She nods, mesmerized by these sizable reptiles before us, separated by less than an inch of weakly woven metal. "I like these guys, even though they'd eat ya if you gave them the chance. Something about their leisurely mosey I think." She enjoys the gators for a bit and I find myself marveling at the fence, examining the base of it, wondering if there's something special to it that keeps these animals at bay. There on the ground, right where we're standing, is a small bottle of perfume. I recognize it immediately as my soulmate's scent and I snatch it up greedily. I feel like this has to be anachronistic this time, a surefire sign, and I pocket it to take back. 

 

As we walk the halls I remark "I think of that as a Waldo scarf by the way." She looks up at me with a joking glare, expecting not to like where I'm going with this. "See, there was a whole book series I really enjoyed as a kid, where there is this massive crowd of people and things, and you'd have to find Waldo. I only realized in retrospect though that on some level Waldo must have wanted to be found. Why else wear all red and white stripes!? I even joked later that he had a brother, Willdo, who was also pictured but actually did want to remain hidden, so he wore a ghillie suit, essentially full and complete camouflage. Anyway, I imagine when you wear that scarf it'll be easy for me to find you, especially when you combine it with your frog hat!" She laughs and tugs a bit on the scarf, and does a little hop and ribbit; it seems my explanation was well received after all.

 

We make it to her door, and I notice she had been humming the songs of the night, but only when she stopped. She turns, stars of her own now in her eyes, for witnessing this origin story firsthand. I give her a hug and she reaches into her pocket, pulling out a disposable camera. My eyes go wide "How did I forget!? How did you manage... What's all this then??" She just gives a sassafras shrug and hands it to me. I stand there stunned for a moment before wrapping things up with "I'll see you tomorrow." She nods and heads back into her room, locking the door.

 

All the way back the night plays in my head. It is only at around halfway when I stop, now noticing that the songs are also softly playing all around. "Stuck in both our heads then, eh?" I smile at another night (again) well spent. Then I remember the flashdrive and suddenly I cannot wait to get back to my room.